Since we were on the subject, you have to take a moment and listen to this 911 call from a woman at Burger King. It involves the dispatcher saying, among other things:

\ldblquote Maam, we\rquote re not going to down there and enforce your western bacon cheeseburger for you.\rdblquote

I have come to the conclusion that it is Mike's fault that we are not wealthy. See, he's not a big fan of fast food, though this does not count donuts - which he loves. He's convinced that fat food, errr, FAST food is greasy, fattening, and will eventually cause all life on the planet to cease. Or, at the very least, make all the life that's left on the planet unpleasant to look at. He goes back and forth on this last issue.

So, while I am avoiding these fast food places, other lucky people are going in to them, ordering food, getting some non-food related item in thier food, and getting large setllments from the fast food companies.

Yes, we've all heard about the Wendy's Chili Finger. The goodness doesn't end there, though. There's also the man who found a mouse in his popeye's chicken, a woman who claims to have found a chicken head in her McDonald's Chicken Wings (with picture), and the infamous Burger King Lizard.

Each one of these happy meals was probably worth a delicious little sum after the litigation and Springer appearances. And, with the possible exception of the finger, each item found was probably no worse to eat than the food which was expected. (Lizards are not high fat foods, and the chicken head would probably be enjoyably crunchy!!).

Alas, however, I am not able to throw my stomach into this gastronmical lottery, as I eschew such places. As I sit here, eating my boring salad, I am saddened by the knowledge that - while only possibly preventing me from getting heart disease, it is definitely preventing me from finding alien bodies in my food and cashing in.

Wait a minute. Is that a bug in my salad?

Cah-CHING!

• High-performance digital SLR with 8.0 Megapixel CMOS Sensor and DIGIC II Image Processor
• Smallest and lightest EOS Digital SLR to date (as of February 2005)
• Fast 3 frames-per-second shooting with a 14 frame burst and 0.2 second startup time
• High-speed, Wide-area 7-point AF with superimposed focusing points
• User-selectable metering patterns, AF modes, custom functions and flash exposure compensation
• Compatible with more than 50 EF and EF-S Lenses and most EOS System accessories including EX-series Speedlites and a dedicated Battery Grip

And I even like the color.

It\rquote s fairly new to market, so I\rquote m going to wait a bit until I get it. For those (like Mike) who wonder why I want it seeing as I already have a Digital Camera there\rquote s several reasons.

First, it\rquote s an SLR camera. Meaning, essentially, it\rquote s a digital version of a real camera with the ability to manual focus and swap out lenses. My current camera is only auto-focus, really, and has a fixed lens. It\rquote s higher resolution and faster shooting speed as well. Oh, and will accept external flash attachments.

On this day where everyone is Irish, I can\rquote t help but think about my dad who was Irish through and through. So, on this special day, I encourage everyone to splurge on at least one Guinness and raise it to his honor.

I plan on doing it as soon as I get home.

Slainte!

PS. Because I know some were worried - you don't have to stop at just 1.

It was so warm here yesterday, I had to carry my jacket all the way home. It was easily in the 80s.

Life is just unfair.

So, I\rquote m in a contracts review session \endash which is pretty much a video taped lecture by some big contracts. It\rquote s not too bad, and the guy is pretty easy to listen to. Aside from a bizarre focus on Sharon Stone, the guy has a pretty good sense of humor. Which is the problem.

Whenever he made a joke, the woman next to me lost it. She laughed long, hard, and loud. Let me rephrase that. Whenever the guy on video tape made a joke, she would laugh her head off long into his pre-recorded next point.

True Example:
Video Tape Guy: When you\rquote re a judge, you\rquote re allowed to spell things however you want. In Law school, though, make sure you spell it correctly.
Woman next to me: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Video Tape Guy: In law school exams, people never live happily ever after...
Woman next to me: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Video Tape Guy: Let's take a 10 minute break...
Woman next to me: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

It's been a long day.

**** Update:

Hmmm, she also answers the video taped questions posed by the video taped lecturer.

Our page 2 gossip columnists have noted that fab-fan K. Moulton had a run in with babe-a-licious Barry Manilow while she was twirling around sin city with her entourage. Surrounded by the opulent d\'e9cor which was shared by Elvis in his days, she and \lquote The Big B\rquote idled the night away chatting about this and that.

Here\rquote s a pic of the pals.

So we took Basil, our attack parrot, to the vet to look at his feather problem. It was a surreal experience, to say the least. We had been recommended a vet by the place where we buy our bird food so early Saturday morning, we stuffed Basil into a carrier and drove over the Golden Gate Bridge.

The office was a surreal mix of something from a horror movie mixed with simply Disney humor. The vet apparently liked creepy objects, as the waiting room was filled to the breaking point with shrunken heads, old phones and devices, and drawings. In addition, bad animal-related puns were everywhere \endash painted on signs, written in marker, ect.

When we were finally led into the examining room, it looked like something out of an old Frankenstein monster movie. Ancient equipment, which looked like it might bust with lightning blots at any time, was crammed into the little room. There were fake eyes, everywhere, glued into the equipment in places where it looked like eyes might belong.

To examine Basil, they knocked him out with a little anesthesia, then put him on this device with a microphone, so you could hear the pitter-pat of his heart. He examined Basil head to toe, took some blood, and he then shaped some of Basil\rquote s beak with a grinder.

The whole thing cost 50 bucks.

Basil was incredibly well behaved the rest of the day. But, on Sunday, he bit Mike, so all was well.

Oh, almost forgot. They think it\rquote s just dry skin \endash so we\rquote re misting Basil and feeding him fish fat.

French techno. Odd Pictures. And a Lip Synching kid. What else can you ask for? It's not naked japanese guys, but almost as odd.

http://www.funpic.hu/swf/numanuma.swf